.Saturday, April 13, 2002

the bluebonnet crop isn't as good as usual, but I still like the way they look against the reddish earth and the cactus (and yes, I played fast and loose with the photo editing but give me a break...I had to shoot around the litter at this spot)

"Les querelles ne durearaient pas longtemps si le tort n'était que d'un côté."
François, duc de la Rochefoucauld

Quarrels would not last long if only one party were in the wrong.

I stumbled around, figuring out what was wrong with the backup script on FFP's machine and fooling with my WEB page. In the end, I didn't post much. I was going to put up Jennifer's essay and in the end I did, but I went off on a tangent to try to redo the entire site (yes, I know, silly) but, of course, in the end I didn't change anything much. Yet. I did take the reference to this journal off the main page. I'm still trying to decide what to do with it. The Visible Woman is too good a title to waste. In my reveries of trying to 'redo the entire site' I imagined that I would have it point to a selected journal page or a beautifully-formed, frequently changing essay. I have lots of ideas. And very few things ever really happen.

I took a couple of phone calls while FFP was gone. First someone called to find out who did our laundry and dry cleaning. Then someone call to invite me to a chocolate and spirits tasting Monday night. Then a guy from a clothing store (Capra and Cavelli) called to say that FFP's custom shirt order had arrived. (More on this later.) Then Dad called and said he was going to come over and look at the garden next door and have a visit.

When I finally got out of bed this morning, I let Chalow out and I noticed one of the sprinklers going in a bed by the back door. I didn't know the cycle FFP had programmed continued that long. I checked the box on my way up to FFP's office. It showed that it was twenty-eight minutes from finishing some activity. So, I figured I'd just go up and try to fix the computer thing and make sure it did finally finish. It had a couple of minutes on it when I returned. How time flies when you are going through menus, manually backing up stuff, yada yada. I don't usually record where my time goes. But go it does.

My parents both still have coughs, but, all in all, they were feeling better. When Forrest came home, I suggested a drive up Texas 29 to see how the flowers were looking. And just to, you know, burn gas and look out the windows. I hadn't had breakfast or lunch and FFP hadn't had lunch, so we went to Hyde Park Bar and Grill. But they had a wait. So we went to Mother's Cafe. That place is older than our waitress was. She memorized the order with no pad and paper. Almost got it right, too.

So FFP was cheerful about doing this drive and I knew he was probably doing it to please me. I felt tense. Then he started worrying about whether he left the AC on in his office area (where our wine cellar is) since the compressor seems to be working but slowly unable to keep the temp at 56 and rather had gone up to 59 or 60. But, he said he enjoyed the drive because I did the driving and let the three of them sit and look (or doze). We only stopped to let me snap a couple of pictures. I'd always wanted to stop at this cool picnic area carved out of a tall red stone outcropping. I remembered it being lots more magnificent, lots taller and broader. and it was also surrounded by litter and had a garbage can overflowing. A barbed-wire fence separated it from someone's land where cactus, bluebonnets and beer bottles and fast food wrappers co-existed. There was a couple at the picnic table (about twenty feet up on the rock) who had parked their Harley in the little lot. They said it used to be nicer. Probably not taller. Or wider. But nicer.

When we got home and were opening the door, I remembered the call from the clothing store. FFP still had time to go get the shirt. I thought it was no big deal, but he really wanted to pick it up and launder it and then make sure it fit so he could order some more. So, yeah, I almost screwed up. Or I did but no harm, no foul. And, he had left the AC off although the compressor was still hoovering on sixty for the wine cellar.

Eventually, we went to the Chinese place over on Burnet. Little Chinatown, it's called. We had giant portions that we had to bring home. They have $10.95 specials that are soup, fried wonton, egg roll and two entrees in one (giant) plate. So we had about four dinners there. The place was kind of dead. I hope they last. It wasn't bad. FFP ask for no MSG and they admitted the soup had it. I ate some but didn't feel bad later.

They had those 'advice cookies' instead of fortune cookies. "When one is helping another, both are strong." said his. "Don't major in minor things." said mine. I started wondering if the lucky numbers they give you are less likely to win since they never give numbers over fifty. (Texas Lotto goes to 54 now, I think.) I mean it's obvious that any random set of six numbers is now, with the addition of the new numbers, less likely to be picked. But what is the significance of never having these numbers on the fortune (advice) cookie lucky numbers? "Yes," I told myself. " Don't major in minor things."

FFP busied himself on the WEB seeing what we might do about our little compressor. He couldn't find the instructions in spite of going through many piles of instruction books and such. He found something on the WEB talking about two modes for a similar model. (Ours, of course, you can't buy any more. Nor can you buy one exactly the same size it seems.) I, of course, decided to go try out the modes without reading very carefully. (Like, at all.) So I changed modes. The bad news was, the other mode was allegedly better for summer. And the only way to change it back was to 'unplug it for ten minutes.' Yeah, right. But it did go down one degree while we stood there. (It had gone from 60 to 61 when FFP was in there looking for a model number or instructions.) He was, as usual, trying to keep the house running. And I, as usual, wasn't much help. (Read: better off without.)

So, yeah, he was trying to deal with this and, at the same time, make me happy by going on a stupid drive with my parents. And I was just pushing buttons. Of course. I'm worthless. And I almost made him not get his new shirt today. Otherwise, I'm the model wife.

I wasted most of the day trying to learn Fireworks. Again. I've been through the manual, tutorials, other books here and there. I did a sample page for a friend who is writing a book to practice. I don't know why I'm interested in doing it. I keep thinking I'll learn to use the tools well enough to overcome my lousy sense of design. In my head, I'm a great designer. I appreciate good design. But the results. Well, not good.

It was a wasted day in some ways. But actually I would have been happy with the way it went. Except. I was kind of tense about it from time to time. It's never fun when things are breaking...like the compressor which is headed that way, I think. And it's bad when you forget to give your hubby a message. And it's hard when you realize that you've spent a day moving pixels around when you could have done something real.

When my parents left today, I sent them off with eight or nine vases I'd cleaned out of the pantry back during my pre-Thanksgiving vacation. They are going to take them to church and the church will use them for flower arrangements for the sick. I sent them off with some baskets discarded from the pantry in that purging, too. Recycle, reuse, reduce. I have gotten in the habit of looking at everything and thinking, "What if I never saw that again?" For the record there are still a bunch of vases (nicer ones) in the storage room.

When I got home from the drive today, there was a message from my sister. "Forrest? Are you there? OK." I thought there could be something wrong but, more likely, my niece had her baby. This turned out to be the case. They have another boy. Jack has a brother. His brother doesn't have a name yet. Sounds like everyone is fine. A year ago today, Jenny and Jack arrived at the airport for a visit. A year ago tomorrow, I'd snapped his picture in the wildflowers on a drive on Texas 29.

I decide that I'll send Jenny some money to spend on fun while she is off on maternity leave. Or on whatever she pleases. I have been intending to start a college fund for these boys (although I hope I'm still around to just help them out then) but I am still pondering Savings Bonds, 529s, yada, yada. I didn't help the kids much with college. Dad used to send them $50/month or something while they were in school. Not much, but appreciated. He got them each their first (used) car, too. I really think kids should make it on their own. Some very, very rich friends have been putting an assortment of nieces and nephews through college. They actually give bonuses for certain kinds of classes or something. I don't know, though. When they discussed it, the kids sounded a little unappreciative.

JUST TYPING
Friday's euphoria.
Is entirely related.
To what you think you can do.
With the time off.