Austin, TEXAS, November 1, 2005 — Catching up the journal is at the same time trivial and significant. And, I haven't done it as I write this. No, I've only succeeded in editing a bunch of pictures from my trip and laying out the format of the pages. And I also have transcribed a bunch of the paper journals I kept over the past forty or so days since I last spoke outloud on the WEB.

Why keep an online journal? (Or paper ones for that matter. I've been scribbling away in paper journals for over a month, trying not to lose track of my life so that I could put it down in pixels, true and complete in some ways, if edited in others.)

Today at around one o'clock, I decided that I was going to put this thing to bed today. No matter what. So I could think about other things.

We all know I write this journal as a 'ground zero' of my creative and dilettante life. I feel, oddly, that failing to do a journal entry for every day on the calendar both means I've failed my mission in life and that other creative pursuits are somehow not possible as if this were step one to doing anything else.

Today when I decided to put this issue to bed I had finished laying out the pages, calendars, inserting some pictures, linking things up. While I'd reviewed a bunch of journals and transcribed some into the computer, I hadn't really written anything. So...can I do it before the day is done? We will see.

I started the day early, at my computer, dealing with e-mails. The day was cool and bright with a cloudless blue sky. So many days like that are wasted on me, even though I'm retired. And so would this one be.

I drove to the gym, did fifty-one minutes on the recumbent bike while reading old newspapers (travel in Burgundy, the gala for the book festival this past week). I did a few weight exercises. Not enough. never enough.

I went home and found FFP trying to duplicate a sandwich from a deli in Bronxville, New York. I ate one, too. And some cheese. And some SweetTarts left over from last night's Halloween.

Then I dug into the journal project. Obsessed and unable to stop myself.

There were interruptions, of course. The mailman came, the maid came. The maid feels the need to talk to me and at one point knocked something over. The dog would beg to go out. FFP would come ask me something. The phone would ring.

FFP said he felt the need for more exercise even though we'd both been to the gym this morning. We thought of going back to the gym but decided to walk the dog around the neighborhood. It has been forever since we did that. We saw a few people we knew, saw the changes in some houses and businesses. The dog loved it, of course.

We cooked salmon. I use the term we loosely. FFP cooked it and also put together some little salads. I cleaned up. I broke a glass, though. Right over the disposal. At the risk of my hands I tried to get every bit out of there. Still it stalled the disposal, but I found the handy little hex wrench and got it going again. (I destroyed the last one breaking a glass in there.)

We watched some funny old Halloween "Simpsons" stuff while we ate. But I turned the TV off and returned to my computer. I am going to catch up the journal even if it has one sentence for each day in October. My (two) fans are asking for it. Why is that no one reads this unless they went to high school with me? That's not really true, of course. Jette asked about my journal. And she's like online journal (you'll never hear that B--- word here) royalty.

FFP emerged from his upstairs office and urged me to watch House. And, to my shame, I did. Yes, although I tried to read my stack of newspapers at the same time, I found myself watching not only that but also a Law and Order. And I recorded Commander in Chief which I officially don't care for. In fact, I could have passed on all this and caught up my journal. But I didn't.

FFP and I went to bed too late. Tomorrow I have water aerobics and then a quick shower at the club to make a meeting with a banker we don't think we will do business with but whom we owe a listen to a proposal.