The Visible Woman...December 6, 2003

I'm trying to simplify my life, get rid of stuff, see a clean surface here and there. Buy less, discard more. But there are guilty pleasures I can't stop myself from indulging in. Ah, those material things.

A lot of my life is spent trying to dig through the complications and simplify my life after I foolishly complicated it.

Remodeling, for example. Wouldn't it be nice...to have a big media and entertainment room? To have the bathroom witout the green bathtub and to have a shower, new fixtures and cabinets? Wouldn't it be nice to have a place for FFP to work in the house and a storage area and place for a wine closet? How about a bigger bedroom/bath with a tub (now that the green one is gone) and a walk-in closet? Wouldn't it be great? Oh what a tangled WEB we weave, however. I mean, really. We could have downsized our possessions and footprint to probably avoid some or all of these remodels. This house had lots of storage to start with. And, at the end of the day, storage yields stuff. Just like flat surfaces attract stuff. Horizontal filing space a friend once called it. Of course, some things, like old plumbing just need to be ripped out and replaced. Sure.

But remodeling isn't the worst of it. I mean you do need space to entertainment and new bathroom stuff seems a must now and then (like after fifty years) and FFP's office arrangement is pretty great. The wine closet has led to the collection of wine but it is very convenient to have a place to keep the stuff. And we do drink it and share it.

No...it's the gadgets and geegaws, the art, the software, the computer peripherals and cameras, the clothes we could have done without, the books, the supplies, the gifts we might give but then don't (or do and clutter other people's lives) and, last but not least, the storage bins, boxes, containers, organizers, files and trays that were meant to bring order but just add to the clutter.

I admit it: I'm always looking to buy something more to be the perfect gadget or piece of furniture or item of clothing. For me or someone else. And that's OK except I don't get rid of something when I get a newer/better/prettier/snazzier whatever. I don't toss things when they don't work out. It just seems so much easier to buy than to organize what you alredy have.

Another thing I do is look at ads for things. I look through the catalogs that come in and the ads in papers and magazines. And inserts. Our mail wasn't delivered yesterday and they delivered it early this morning and there were seven catalogs. I should have just tossed them straight to recycling but, no, I had to look through them. The REI catalog made me want clothes I don't need for weather we don't have and renewed my longing for a GPS device...maybe this one combined with a PDA and MP3 player for $500. Stop me!

The Dell catalog just got a quick flip...things always seem more expensive once you go to the WEB site...the big bold price doesn't include the amount of a mail-in rebate (I HATE those) and of course there are essential things you will want to upgrade like the OS or something. Of course, yesterday's paper had a big Fry's ad which I can't resist looking at although the actual items never seem to be on offer at the store. There were, in fact, several ad inserts in yesterday's paper featuring tempting things like leather jackets and jeans. Only...I have jeans in boxes that fit and are nice enough although some are a little worn. And I have a leather jacket. Still...what deals!

The Sharper Image catalog didn't tempt me at all...except I would like to play with the $5000 Simpsons pinball machine...but not own it. Oh, well, sure there are some things I want in there...including a chrome, lighted magnifying mirror for our new bathroom. But I'm not ready to buy. Only...I might get that mirror for FFP for Christmas. (I hope he's not reading. While working on the budget yesterday we agreed to put gifts to each other under the 'gifts' category. That was when I discovered a Barnes and Noble receipt on the credit card bill that wasn't in the budget file. He sheepishly admitted it was my Christmas present.)

A Brookstone catalog was in this group, too. They have really high-end stuff...a Segway for example. Hey, they have arcade size repros of Pacman to go with that Simpsons pinball. But, really, I'd just as soon read a book. A Herrington Catalog arrived, too. They have footstools shaped like bears and buffalos and a beautiful Leica digital camera.

Well...if I can confine myself to the guilty pleasure of just looking that is good. The only things I really bought today were these special bed pillows and some books and calendars...all gifts except for one D-Day book.

FFP at the edge of destruction	guilty pleasures of materialism I'm trying to simplify my life, get rid of stuff, see a clean surface here and there. Buy less, discard more. But there are guilty pleasures I can't stop myself from indulging in. Ah, those material things. A lot of my life is spent trying to dig through the complications and simplify my life after I foolishly complicated it. Remodeling, for example. Wouldn't it be nice...to have a big media and entertainment room? To have the bathroom witout the green bathtub and to have a shower, new fixtures and cabinets? Wouldn't it be nice to have a place for FFP to work in the house and a storage area and place for a wine closet? How about a bigger bedroom/bath with a tub (now that the green one is gone) and a walk-in closet? Wouldn't it be great? Oh what a tangled WEB we weave, however. I mean, really. We could have downsized our possessions and footprint to probably avoid some or all of these remodels. This house had lots of storage to start with. And, at the end of the day, storage yields stuff. Just like flat surfaces attract stuff. Horizontal filing space a friend once called it. Of course, some things, like old plumbing just need to be ripped out and replaced. Sure. But remodeling isn't the worst of it. I mean you do need space to entertainment and new bathroom stuff seems a must now and then (like after fifty years) and FFP's office arrangement is pretty great. The wine closet has led to the collection of wine but it is very convenient to have a place to keep the stuff. And we do drink it and share it. No...it's the gadgets and geegaws, the art, the software, the computer peripherals and cameras, the clothes we could have done without, the books, the supplies, the gifts we might give but then don't (or do and clutter other people's lives) and, last but not least, the storage bins, boxes, containers, organizers, files and trays that were meant to bring order but just add to the clutter. I admit it: I'm always looking to buy something more to be the perfect gadget or piece of furniture or item of clothing. For me or someone else. And that's OK except I don't get rid of something when I get a newer/better/prettier/snazzier whatever. I don't toss things when they don't work out. It just seems so much easier to buy than to organize what you alredy have. Another thing I do is look at ads for things. I look through the catalogs that come in and the ads in papers and magazines. And inserts. Our mail wasn't delivered yesterday and they delivered it early this morning and there were seven catalogs. I should have just tossed them straight to recycling but, no, I had to look through them. The REI catalog made me want clothes I don't need for weather we don't have and renewed my longing for a GPS device...maybe this one combined with a PDA and MP3 player for $500. Stop me! The Dell catalog just got a quick flip...things always seem more expensive once you go to the WEB site...the big bold price doesn't include the amount of a mail-in rebate (I HATE those) and of course there are essential things you will want to upgrade like the OS or something. Of course, yesterday's paper had a big Fry's ad which I can't resist looking at although the actual items never seem to be on offer at the store. There were, in fact, several ad inserts in yesterday's paper featuring tempting things like leather jackets and jeans. Only...I have jeans in boxes that fit and are nice enough although some are a little worn. And I have a leather jacket. Still...what deals! The Sharper Image catalog didn't tempt me at all...except I would like to play with the $5000 Simpsons pinball machine...but not own it. Oh, well, sure there are some things I want in there...including a chrome, lighted magnifying mirror for our new bathroom. But I'm not ready to buy. Only...I might get that mirror for FFP for Christmas. (I hope he's not reading. While working on the budget yesterday we agreed to put gifts to each other under the 'gifts' category. That was when I discovered a Barnes and Noble receipt on the credit card bill that wasn't in the budget file. He sheepishly admitted it was my Christmas present.) A Brookstone catalog was in this group, too. They have really high-end stuff...a Segway for example. Hey, they have arcade size repros of Pacman to go with that Simpsons pinball. But, really, I'd just as soon read a book. A Herrington Catalog arrived, too. They have footstools shaped like bears and buffalos and a beautiful Leica digital camera. Well...if I can confine myself to the guilty pleasure of just looking that is good. The only things I really bought today were these special bed pillows and some books and calendars...all gifts except for one D-Day book.
JUST TYPING A catalog. The pleasure of wanting. Don't kill it. By getting. Too much.
		Food Diary. *breakfast* four pieces of turkey bacon *lunch* cup of venison chili large Caesar salad with croutons small roll *snacks* none *dinner* cheese, chips, hot sauce, green onions a can of smoked oysters, mustard and crackers Today I - think much about food until I was shopping for it after 8PM - didn't drink alcohol.
		Time flies.... We knew we had to get up. The framer was coming early. So at 7:15 we were crawling out, crawling into our sweats, making up the bed. (The fold out bed is a disaster with the dog rooting around us and pulling the sheets out. We even threatened to get her little bed out of storage and make her sleep on the floor.) Then I fooled around with e-mail and my journal and actually read some other people's journals. When FFP came home, we got ready to go out and then his cousin came by and we looked at the remodel. We looked at beds. Only we only looked at one bed...the split king (really two singles pushed together) fully automatic Tempur-Pedic thing. Whoa. That's some bed. Or beds really that you push together. "Where would the dog sleep?" I asked. [Later, I ask himself whether this orderly you do your thing and I do mine will suit the sleeping style of two people and a dog randomly rolling around in the bed. Chalow being especially random and shifting sides and sometimes trying to get between us. That crack between us could surprise her especially if you didn't lock the things down. Oh...and I wonder if people could buy this and then split the sheets, literally later?] We ate some lunch at 34th Street and we went to Half Price and bought some Christmas presents. Then we went home. Good thing. "Do you hear water running?" himself asked. The plumbers had left pipes standing where the old shower was. The framer had banged around until somehow the riser and runner had separated. And water gushed forth. Fortunately it was right beside the old trap door so one could easily see it. We called for emergency plumbing and I cut off the inside cutoff which rendered the gush a drip. A steady drip but still less. I thought it might be the hot water and empty the unit and I tried to find that cut off. I initially turned off the gas and had to relight the pilot. We spent the next few hours measuring the framed space for furniture, talking about furniture, watching the plumber, etc. When I got back to my computer, I was plunged into the France 2004 trip planning by my friend LG's annoucement via e-mail that our Auberge d'Ill reservation was made. FFP and I will eat stars, three at once, take that Michelin Man! We are neophyte star eaters although we've eaten at some restaurants of renown like Daniel in New York City. So I started looking at recommendations like car rentals, hotels, etc. Very exciting (and frightening, too, since FFP is going for the first time and I want to make sure that he has a great time and it is entirely my responsibility). I finished calculating my budget for November and FFP went to 'supervise' the Nutcracker Mother Ginger VIP and I headed out for a workout and a bit of reading and a stop at the grocery store. There weren't many people at the little convenience store Randall's on Exposition. I managed $12 in card and coupon savings, too. And ended up with beef (for FFP), bananas, cereal, milk, some highend cheese, green onions, apples, broccoli, a tomato, two bags of El Galindo tortilla chips (the staff of life), two kinds of mustard, two frozen Michaelangelo's Eggplant Parmesan (FFP's current favorite convenience food), 18 eggs and two cans of regular chili and one of turkey chili. At home I ate stupid things for dinner (late). FFP came home and went to an online board to argue about why the Texas Longhorns are their own worst enemies. I fire up the laptop and work on my Christmas card and Christmas card list. [Ed. Note: If you are reading this and you do not receive this snail mail there could be many reasons for that: you don't snail mail either, somehow your name is lost in the 211 chosen from the 390 on my list, we don't know you, whatever. But don't despair...it's not very clever. It is a variation on a speech I gave at my fifty-third birthday. It is about how knowing people expands our experience. People who do get it will say, "Oh, yeah, Preece and Ball, whatever." and toss it in the pile with glossies of children in elfware and glittery pictures of trees and snowmen.] In between tweaking the card, I select records from my Access Data Base for labels. Soon holiday cards will be done and only shopping for a few gifts will remain for the season. I'm not really feeling festive.

		Reading. The Secret of D-Day on the bike. I also started a book called Afternoon of a Writer which I read while the plumber was lying on the floor welding the pipe under the house to stop the leak.
		e-mails about social events and trips taken with friends.
		Exercise thirty-six minutes on the recumbent bicycle my chest, shoulders and triceps exercises twenty-six minutes on the recumbent bicycle
	. .	133/68 64 Felt a little fuzzy upon getting up but immediately felt better.
	It's a Tangled Web we weave...these days of our lives.	One year ago "I plan to work on projects unrelated to the (alleged) birth of Christ and whatever event the other religions are commemorating. It will sort of be the ritual clensing of the closet and filing cabinet time for me. The sacred cleaning of the hard drive. Not to make fun of the sacred season of shopping or anything." Two years ago "Just because you get food from the food bank, why can't there be a nice surprise now and then?"