Wednesday, October 23, 2002

me and the boys

"Wherever there is a flat surface, someone will find something to put on it."
Col. Lawrence Ballweg, Quoted in a Book on Borders Bargain Table that I didn't buy

Even though I don't have anything for Dad to sign, look up, notarize, file or think about, I go over there. We go to IHOP and have lunch. I have some kind of Mexican breakfast which is very filling. We go to both Borders and Barnes and Noble and look. I succumb to a map and a book at B&N. I didn't know there was a Michelin Green Guide for Berlin. I decide I have to have it. The map isn't really necessary but I sort of like the format. At least I get a 10% discount at B&N with the card.

Hanging out as long as I wish in the bookstore is a pleasure. Dragging my dad along is weird, but it distracts him. He has gotten out Halloween decorations at his house. That's so strange. He says the neighbors have invited him over to dinner. That's nice. He says he thinks he'll make a trip to Dallas while I'm in Berlin. He'll visit his brother, some other relatives and a couple of friends.

I stop by the store in our neighborhood after this and am disappointed that (1) the store is in disarray from remodeling; and (2) they don't have two things I've come for and for only one do I find an acceptable sustitute. Have to go to the other stores until that is straightened out. Worrying about little errands like buying soap and coffee and lemon pepper seasoning is strange, too. And strangely satisfying.

I review my packing list for Berlin and decide that I'll pack my bag. I usually do this in the guest room where I have some drawers with travel stuff. But this room is piled with stuff I brought home from the office as well as stuff ejected from other rooms for various reasons. (Usually something got replaced with something else.) So I spend a while sorting stuff, getting a bunch of stuff together to go to the thrift store. Finally I have made a place to work on packing and identified an assortment of stuff that I'm really, definitely going to take to the thrift store. Some of this stuff is sort of cute gee-gaws and such but I must downsize! I must reduce clutter! Yep.

I really do think the clutter is interfering with my attempt to lead a more orderly, focused life. To focus on reading, writing, studying, exercising, thinking. So, yeah, down with clutter. Hang Sentimental value. To heck with cute.

I'm too tired from sorting junk to actually pack. But I'm ready to pack. Tomorrow. I have to hang around here and wait for a courier to deliver some Euros. (Just thought I'd try that online currency thing.) So I'll pack then.

I settle down with a vodka/tonic and watch an interview with Jim Jarmusch on IFC and then FFP joins me and we watch Ghost Dog. Then we flip to Law and Order and then the end of the Series game.

I love Jarmusch but had avoided Ghost Dog because I thought I wouldn't like it. I did like it, though. However, I worry. I worry because I would like to make movies. Write them, direct them. But why does it take guns to move them along? Why, why, why?

Most people don't actually experience violence in their lives. Most people don't. Yeah, yeah. September 11. The Washington Sniper. It seems to take death to move a plot. Plots are particularly fond of violent death. Why is that?

This is an overstatement, of course. There are a few Woody Allens, there's My Dinner with André. Anyway, I like Ghost Dog and the juxtaposition of rappers and gansters is so, so funny and the guy's friend the ice cream man who only speaks French is such a trip. But my movies (even if they stay in my head) will have no guns, no airplanes crashing into buildings, no exploding buses. It isn't something I've experienced. I could never get that far from my truth. Having said that, I know violence is the way of mankind. I do, after all, read three newspapers. Sometimes within a week of the time they arrive.

JUST TYPING
A full month of retirement.
I feel retired.
How did I ever bother with work?