The Visible Woman...March 17, 2004

Wednesday, March 17, 2004

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A Journal from Austin, Texas.
A Project of LBFFP Stealth Publishing.

health and mood

looking for a niche

The truth is that I'm looking for a passion, a niche where I can pour energy, a place to land in the world. The film festival has been revealing for this task.

Yes, I'm looking for something to be passionate about. Something to spend time on gladly and enthusiasticly as I used to do on work. (Well, I spent the time on work anyway.) For one thing, you see people who are really passionate about what they do. And they accomplish amazing things. I heard the producer of the TV movie Cosmopolitan speak after the film was shown. She was so ethusiastic about the movie and her role in it...raising money and getting it made. I heard Jim Jarmusch and Rick Linklater talk about their passion for making movies. I've seen movies about Clifford Antone and Billy Joe Shaver...men who found salvation in an overwhelming passion for music. (Well, they also, especially Bill Joe, seem to find salvation in Jesus but that, as they say, is another story.) I saw a film made by a kid who went with some Mexicans trying to cross the border and work. That's commitment to getting your story.

Now, for me, movies may not be it. My passion may take another direction.

It's true that I dabble. Maybe dabbling is, in fact, my passion. Hard to say. Somehow I hope not, though.

Yours truly, reflected in shop window on Congress.

JUST TYPING

Great things come.
From great passion.
Unbending desire.
To do something.
To stay on one track.
Until you get to the station.
Although, passion or not.
We never really arrive.

Food Diary.

breakfast

nothing

lunch

Schlotsky's small original, chips (220 calories), a couple of pepperoncini, iced tea (no sugar...I just mention it because I usually avoid caffeine with food)

snacks

popcorn with that 'butter' stuff
Diet Coke (I just mention it because, calories or not, ingesting chemicals seems like a bad idea)

a Manhattan
about three ounces of cheddar cheese, a bunch of carrots and green onions

dinner

Jack Daniels and water
tuna and salmon tartare
stuffed tomato, carrot risotto, mushroom compote
glass of Pinot
a corn muffin, some crispy things and a piece of bread with butter

Today I
-ate too much junk
- almost forgot to write down the bread and butter...as I frequently do.

Meta: Lately, reading the 'old school' style (don't you hate that term) journal entries I sometimes think that their free-wheeling sort of chronological, sort of not with food diary, exercise log and such thrown in with out regard to organization is better in some ways. I sometimes include tidbits that wouldn't fit anywhere in the current organization. Things like overheard conversations. Nevertheless, I'm not changing back. I may, however, start up a few more sidebars. You've probably already noticed the informal 'possessions' inventory.

Time flies....

I got up with difficulty but I got the bed made, had some coffee and got into my swim suit and got to the club by 8:15. I did aerobics and then rode the recumbent bike, reading my book.

I should have exercised more but I started thinking about what I needed to do at home and about seeing a movie or several. I went home, got the clean laundry put away, worked a bit on the journal and got cleaned up. I went to the Dobie. I caught the TV feature, Cosmopolitan, and exchanged cards with the producer. I got lunch and saw Majados: Through the Night. In between, I figured out that we should see Portrait of Billie Joe in the evening. I called FFP and suggested that I come home, that we dine at Four Seasons (the cafe is desserted in the evening as the activity in the bar rages on) and walk over to the convention center for the movie. And this we do. We meet a talkative, retired, recently divorced physical therapist who left her doctor husband with the 5,000 square foot house for a condo at the Nakona. She recently broke both tibia and fibia at the ankle. Isn't it amazing how much you can find out about people in the couple of minutes before a show starts?

We went home after the movie, watched some TV, did a little reading.

Reading.

Newspapers.

The Life of Ernie Pyle by Lee G. Miller.

A short story that I saw a movie adaptation of today. Cosmopolitan. (Printed it from the site of The Atlantic Monthy. Ain't the WEB grand?)

nothing

Thinking about things.

Globes.
I once had a collection of them.
I guess I still do.
I make a rough count of twenty-two.
A world of earths.

(3165)

Exercise

recumbent bike	30min
treadmill
ergonomic rower
water aerobics	1hr
chest, shoulder, triceps
leg, back, bicep
lower back
ab exercises
stretches
walking
tennis

Should have done some situps or weights.

Felt excited about the rich world today. It seems full of possibility. For me anyway. Most of the people in the world have remarkably little richness and choice. But we do. Especially me. But you, too, if you are reading this.

It's a Tangled
Web we weave...these
days of our lives.

spam subject of the day: rate proposing flesh with resignation articulate

One year ago
"TV is overrated, is it not? Still, I can't abide the people who proudly tell me that they never watch it. I don't know why. It just seems as if they think not watching TV is some kind of solution. I like active solutions. I don't mind if people say they've decided to (fill in the blank) walk, meditate, masturbate, go to the gym for hours a day. Do something. Not watching TV is an interesting fact about you but not a badge of honor, it makes you nothing. What you do instead, that's different. Personally, I watch too much TV!"

Two years ago
"I look at the recipes in the NYT magazine. Both start with the ingredient 'half of a baby lamb' and I give up that idea. I make a pot of coffee instead."

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