The Visible Woman...January 8, 2004

Things are happening. You know another shoe is going to drop here and there. You are just waiting to hear the news.

I seem to be in the waiting mode. My dad feels it about my sister's condition. He tries to call my niece. "She sent me a package and maybe she will know something," he says. She doesn't know anything more when he does reach her, but my brother-in-law calls him and tells him my sister will go into surgery at 4:30 their time. So, of course, I'm waiting to here about that.

We spend part of the day waiting around for a cabinet maker who doesn't come and for a plumber who finally does.

I ask Dad about his ordered cat scan and the appointment isn't for ten more days. (The place he is referred to has a broken machine. Hrmmph.) Then we will wait while they analyze it, I guess. If they don't lose the results.

Of course, when a friend is in Christopher House, it's all about waiting. I told him we'd come back by on the weekend. FFP called someone else who knew him and he said he would visit.

Another friend told me about a decision that was almost certainly made that will change some things for her. Waiting to hear on that one, too.

While waiting to hear and waiting for plumbers, you must go on with it and just keep doing your thing. I show the plumber the toilet we want replaced and talk to him a few times while he does his job.

We go out with a friend, a widower, and his girlfriend. We've been waiting to hear they'd get married and they are. They are trying to sell houses, make plans.

When we get home, my dad has the news about my sister's surgery and it sounds as good as we good expect. Long rehab, though. But that can begin.

	waiting to hear Things are happening. You know another shoe is going to drop here and there. You are just waiting to hear the news. I seem to be in the waiting mode. My dad feels it about my sister's condition. He tries to call my niece. "She sent me a package and maybe she will know something," he says. She doesn't know anything more when he does reach her, but my brother-in-law calls him and tells him my sister will go into surgery at 4:30 their time. So, of course, I'm waiting to here about that. We spend part of the day waiting around for a cabinet maker who doesn't come and for a plumber who finally does. I ask Dad about his ordered cat scan and the appointment isn't for ten more days. (The place he is referred to has a broken machine. Hrmmph.) Then we will wait while they analyze it, I guess. If they don't lose the results. Of course, when a friend is in Christopher House, it's all about waiting. I told him we'd come back by on the weekend. FFP called someone else who knew him and he said he would visit. Another friend told me about a decision that was almost certainly made that will change some things for her. Waiting to hear on that one, too. While waiting to hear and waiting for plumbers, you must go on with it and just keep doing your thing. I show the plumber the toilet we want replaced and talk to him a few times while he does his job. We go out with a friend, a widower, and his girlfriend. We've been waiting to hear they'd get married and they are. They are trying to sell houses, make plans. When we get home, my dad has the news about my sister's surgery and it sounds as good as we good expect. Long rehab, though. But that can begin.
backstage at the Kennedy opera house
JUST TYPING Waiting. For good news, for bad news. For death to happen. For life to happen. Waiting. For the plumber.
		Food Diary. *breakfast* about three cups of coffee *lunch* a plate of nachos *snacks* a couple of cups of coffee dinner [Lambert's] heart of romaine salad with lemon dressing and anchovy and parmasan cheese seared rare tuna steak with baked tomato and onion ring garnish part of a bread pudding my share of two bottles of wine coffee Today I - shouldn't have had nachos but, um, I didn't eat beef!.
Meta: I'm back to more or less real time...starting this entry on the date at the top.		Time flies.... I wake up from a hard sleep full of dreams of rising water, babies and many rooms. FFP says it's time to get up. I stayed up too late, I guess. I do get up and dress in sweats. I don't go to the club because before I get off FFP says someone is coming by to discuss the remodel at 11 and I don't want to be rushed. I figure I'll fit it in (a workout) later but I never do. I go to Sam's for a few things we need and hurry back so FFP can go for an appointment and I can wait for a plumber to put a better toilet in his office upstairs. I could go to the gym after the plumber leaves and FFP comes home but I don't. Instead I finish my journal and take a leisurely shower and get dressed to go out to dinner with friends. We see the traffic on Mopac and think we will be late but we are pathologically punctual as usual.

		Reading. Newspapers. A little catching up to do and I'm not doing it well.
		Hey...I caught up with the journal and it is my life's work.
		Exercise nothing
	. .	Felt good today physically except my stomach felt strange a few times. Mood isn't so good from worrying about stuff...especially my sister, but I feel relieved when I hear the surgery is over.
	It's a Tangled Web we weave...these days of our lives.	If you like jazz or want to learn about it, you can learn a lot from a photo called 'Great Day in Harlem.' The link takes you to a WEB site devoted to the photo. This photo is the subject of a documentary film, too. Combine this with some google searches (or be radical and use teoma) and a subscription to listen to music at listen.com . and watch the movie, peruse the WEB site, listen to some cuts, run a few WEB searches and it could be an entire jazz education. One year ago "I've found that domestic things (doing laundry, preparing food and cleaning up the kitchen, shopping for food) seem to balloon out and fill the time you have. These cleanup projects both here and at Dad's (mostly here) seem to take a long time to bear fruit. (Then, however, I open a neat cabinet or closet and fill a nice exhilaration.)" Two years ago "My focus seems to have been narrowed and what I appreciated on this trip, I appreciated all the more somehow."